Fear & Loathing In The Nine-Nine
by Embodiment-Of-Fear
Summary: The detectives are left many types of scars after the short time the Vulture was captain. But unbeknownst to the others, Jake has had the Vulture messing with his life for years. He was going to tell someone, try to climb out of the ditch he was dug into. The one day he insisted would end it all ended up being the day he took it one step too far Marked OC cuz no Vulture Tag D:


(Welcome to Fear & Loathing In The Nine-Nine! This fanfiction will be my next stepping stone into writing dark, heart-wrenching, and realistic abuse, suicide, and self-harm. Trigger warnings for mentions of assault and suicide attempts. Dedicated to Faithful_Dumpling because this one is gonna hurt just a bit more than the last. Go crazy you fucking manic. For everyone else, enjoy :D ~ Fear Itself)

"It's alright, it's just a nightmare..." Heart racing, Jacob Peralta curled his knees to his chest and leaned against the wall. He thought that maybe since the Vulture was gone, the memories would go away but they seemed to only get worse.

As the wind halted, the shadows from across the road ceased to move. Whispers traveled from one end to the other, quietly taunting him of his weaknesses. Tears dripping down his face, they couldn't help but laugh.

"Why not I shut the cretin up for good?" Brandishing a blade he began his way across the street. No lights, no sign of help. In a pure panic, he reached his arm out, trying to find some sort of kindle.

"Very well, tomorrow I'll offer up my sweet sacrifice again."

When he opened his eyes once more, a dim light flickered in and out of the worn lamp on his bedside table. Heart pounding, he wiped his eyes.

"It's alright, it's just a nightmare." Sitting up, Jake looked to his outstretched arm and to the bayonet just out of his grasp. "Good God, what happened last night?"

Unable to fall back asleep, he threw on the TV. With the Goodfellas playing in the background, he decided to make breakfast. Of course, his fridge proved to be quite barren with 7 liters of orange off-brand Fanta, one expired yogurt container he took one bite of before shoving it away, leftover frozen pizza and a ramen cup. No, he doesn't know how it got there. In his pantry, there were some emergency rations when shit hits, a single saltine in a plastic baggie, a bag of Sour Patch Kids, and white bread. Though he couldn't find how old it was. Not wanting to spend much cash on food, he grabbed two slices of the bread that smelled half normal, a handful of candies, a bit of sauce he scrapped off the pizza into a sandwich before putting the saltine next to it. Flipping to a news channel, he couldn't help but grunt.

"Jesus Christ he's our president and he ain't getting impeached anytime soon so calm the hell down and deal with it." Trying to find something to lighten the mood, he settled on Good Times, an old classic. If only modern TV was like Good Times, when's the last time a comedy managed to delve into abuse without it being South Park? Or was it Family Guy? He couldn't really remember anymore. Attempting to eat his sandwich without dying just a little more on the inside, he glanced at his foggy watch. It was only 2:30! Sighing, Jake leaned back into his recliner. A few hours passed as he got lost in a random mix of jokes and Cheer's drinks before finally returning to reality. Despite the lighthearted start to his morning, he still felt dread loom over his shoulders. Today they were supposed to meet to discuss their next steps of who to tell about the Vulture situation.

Though it might seem selfish, Jake couldn't bring himself to tell anyone. The message he left him with was quite dark, to say the least.

He wasn't about to let Amy get hurt because he wanted a little more protection. I mean this wasn't that bad, right?

Jacob decided to go to work early today, it was the only place he didn't feel so claustrophobic. Once the elevator door opened, he noticed the night shift slowly filing out while Holt sat in his office, signing some documents. Quietly, he went to his desk and hid his face behind the computer in hopes Holt didn't see him. This is the 4th time he's been early to work and he was pretty sure that the captain was on to him. Though of course, he had to see him come in through the door.

"Peralta, you're here early... again."

"Couldn't sleep, wanted to finish Stranger Things but I gotta savor it!"

"Did you sleep at all?"

"Ya, though I did wake up." Facing his screen, he munched on the sad saltine he brought with him.

"Is that all you've eaten for breakfast," Holt asked, giving him a glare.

"No I had a sandwich... ok MAYBE it was sour patch kids and pizza sauce on questionably moldy bread but same difference!" Shaking his head, the captain to returned to his office. Thinking he was gone, he focused on work again but he came back, slamming something on his desk.

"For once in your life, eat actually food Peralta." Before he got a chance to give it back to him, the door was already locked shut. Examining what he placed, it looked to be some Whole Foods brand breakfast bar.

"Oatmeal and raisin, what kind of barbarian eats this stuff?" Thinking ahead, he shoved the bar in his pocket, he really couldn't handle eating that sandwich for breakfast tomorrow.

"Break room, 12:03 sharp." Nodding, he decided against meeting Terry's eyes. Taking in the last few minutes to finish a bit of paperwork, Jake felt a knot in his stomach tie tighter. He really didn't want to tell them, but if he wanted to keep their mouths shut he'd have to. After signing his name, he headed for the room which for the first time was Hitchcock and Scully free.

"Welcome, Jake."

"Sup, is that pizza for us?"

"Ya, thought some light food would balance this conversation out."

"Noice." Enjoying the free food, Amy came in next and sat down next to him. Rosa, then Charles took a seat before finally, the meeting began.

"This is about the Vulture situation right?"

"Did you not get the memo, Boyle?" Sighing, Terry started it off. "One of us is gonna have to tell the captain about what happened. Which one of us wants to crawl down that hole?" They all go silent for several moments before Rosa spoke up.

"If no one else will, I can. Summing it up into as few words as possible will make things less awkward and then we can get more authority's involved before vowing to never speak of the experience again."

"Well that was easy... so I got this pizza for nothing?"

"No you didn't, I have an objection you'll want all the grease you can for."

"You want to tell the captain?"

"No, you CAN'T tell the captain." Looking among each other, the detectives were downright confused.

"You better explain right now."

"Oh I will, just don't say I didn't warn you" taking a long obnoxious bite of pizza, he swallowed and began. "Keith has been exporting money out of me for years and if I were to stop and or tell anyone what was going on he would assault Amy." The entire room fell quiet, not even the birds outside flew.

"Excuse me what?" Amy, who now had dropped her soda cup attempted to keep her face calm but it was a lost cause.

"I'm really sorry you had to find out this way Ames but I needed to protect you." Of course, this wasn't half the truth but poison dropped in high dosages causes panic, right now peace was more important.

"Oh don't I'm sorry Ames me! You had absolutely no reason not to tell someone. You should know better than anyone else that what he's doing is illegal."

"Santiago as your boyfriend and partner in not crime, I couldn't risk anything happening to you."

"Well maybe if you just TOLD SOMEONE we could've sorted this out and nothing would've happened to any of us."

"I'm not leaving my chances to fate when it's proven to not work out so great. The trauma sexual assault leaves isn't worth the trouble. He just takes a good chunk of my paycheck and that's that."

"Amy, go fill out some paperwork, take a breather. You can't blame him for feeling trapped in that position. Jake, we're gonna go talk to the captain right now."

"Terry please just give me a little more time to sort this out. I'll talk to Keith and we can make sure no one gets hurt!" Grunting, he begrudgingly decided to compromise.

"Fine... one week... one week and if this problem isn't fixed I'm going to pick you up by your toe, drag you face-first to his office, and make you tell him myself!"

"Tell me what?" Everyone tensed as they turned to face Raymond Holt, now standing in the doorway.

"It's-"

"Nothing sir, nothing whatsoever, now don't you have to file some case reports sir?" Jake standing up fast began ushering him out.

"Peralta..."

"Go! You'll find out if you need to." Once out of earshot, Terry brushed past him.

"Oh, and if you don't sort this out, you're telling him about the other Vulture situation to." Gulping, his shoulders got heavier. Why didn't he just let Rosa do the talking?


End file.
